Living it day by day.



Monday, January 11, 2010

thought in hand

staring at my ceiling for the pass few hours with the occasional get up and refresh facebook action.

i thought to my self, where is my life gonna be headed. i hav a pair of hands, and they seem magical, why? because sometimes they seem full and sometimes they don.

u noe the vy quotable quote we always see? "the future is in ur hands" or something like that.

how much of it is true? andi just how much of it is bullshit

i stared at my palm, its big enough to hold an apple, but can i guide myself up again? yes i noe it was a metaphorical speech but yet it has some truth in it, if u wan to eat the apple, u gotta hav it in ur hands rite?

occasionally i just feel a gush of wind through me. that left me feeling, helpless annd non existent

i dunno how or why, i feel that my world is so small now.

i noe Min Min is always there with me, and then my mom and bro. if i m back in kampar i got my mates as well. but yet as i came back to kl, i notice something , actually Min made me notice something. i don hav anything to do here anymore. those dota sessions which usually ends up with yum cha-ing nearby and crapping. turns out to more of a drinking sessions. and i don even noe wat i m doin there... (sry guys, i seem far away now) ...

it seems to me, that i m cut out to actually be more alone that i thought i should, i mean i look up at my phone and my facebook and all i see is a few notable numbers who i can call to chill. less den a hands worth. i seem to be walking at a path that i m lost in but has yet to noe.

i must hav thought i had evrything under control. but it isnt, i was just leaving in the past.~ things has definitely chg, naiveness don work anymore, no one cares for that shit anymore.

when u stare down at ur own palms, do u think u hav urself under control, or are u imagining it.

waking up from a dream of the past, i must have been under chronic hibernation~





cheahwey said...

all i see is a few notable numbers who i can call to chill. less den a hands worth

I suppose you could look at it to mean you have found your good friends, instead of being surrounded by so many people, which today, really begs the question, does having a lot of friends really mean you have a lot of friends?

Quality over quantity, you know?

benjaminvai said...

yea i hav a few quality friends, u included , but den again mayb its my fault for living so far and being transport less, lol, thx hwey

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